The Life of a Southern Girl

I am saddened by the fact that the second biggest sports story today so far (Detroit/Indiana being #1) is the blowup that occured on the field during the Clemson/Carolina game. Even though I am a staunch Clemson fan; I will be the first to say that both sides were at fault. Although; I'm surprised this is the first time it's happened. Having been bitter rivals for, something like, 100 years; this particular face-off carries unbelievable tension from the moment you arrive at the stadium. With my Dad & Uncle both being graduates (Dad was there when it was a Military College), I grew up in a Clemson household & attended countless home games until I left SC. We would always kind of cruise through the season always looking forward to who would wind up with the bragging rights from what is always the last game. To put this rivalry in perspective for you; until (& I think it was Tennesee?) the first mega college stadium was built with over 100,000 seats; the Clemson/Carolina game in Clemson held the national record for attendance at a college game with 84,000 +. In a town with a population of roughly 12,000. And there was a time during Danny Ford's years there that EVERY home game came close to that record.

I talked to my sister a couple of hours after the game, and she said that it was actually calm amongst the fans until the players took to the field.

Clemson's stadium is in a valley. Hence the nickname "Death Valley". One end of the stadium is a grassy hill where fans buy space & literally sit on the grass during the game. In the center at the top of the hill is a pedestal with a rock from the actual Death Valley on it. One of Clemson's biggest football traditions is that all the players take to the field by running down the hill with each one touching the rock for good luck. They continue to run across the field to the other side where the bench is. Every college has their own traditions; and as a courtesy, visiting teams respect them. Just as their traditions are respected when they are the home team.

I recall during a C/C game maybe 15 years ago that Carolina actually entered the field at the same time we were running down the hill. And I may be wrong; but I think that's the only time that has happened until today. At that game; they just ran on, but didn't try to interfere with the Clemson players doing what they normally do. My sister told me that today; they not only ran onto the field early; but stood at the bottom of the hill and tried to prevent Clemson from passing. Carolina has the tradition of running out of "The Tunnel" at Williams-Brice stadium. I can't even imagine what would happen if we ever tried to prevent them from doing that. In either case; Paige said that action just set the tone for the game.

At this point, I want to give kudos to every single other team that we play in Clemson. No other team has ever shown as much disrespect as Carolina did today by that move. They have all stood back to our traditions just as we do to theirs when visiting their home turf. Most Clemson fans consider Florida State our main rival since they joined the ACC. Our record against them is not very good; but it is always a pleasure to host them. Their players & fans alike always show good sportsmanship. I think I've had as many before & after game cocktails with Florida State fans as I've had with my own family at those games.

I don't want to sound like I'm pointing fingers & saying, "Well, THEY started it!". Even though their actions set the tone for the game; the reality is that we were right there throwing punches with the rest of them. Paige told me that some Clemson fans were even throwing things onto the field. That is inexcusable.

I feel sorry for Lou Holtz. This was the last game of his career. And this is how his players sent him off. (Hey Spurrier!! Look what you're getting into!!) Anyway, it's just sad, sad, sad. Frank Howard is rolling over in his grave. Danny Ford is poppin' in some chew & just shaking his head.

And Paige: I am very proud of you for not getting into a "Discussion" with anyone cheering for the other team! (My sister is a fan on a couple levels higher than I am. She has a Clemson tiger paw tattoo on her shoulder blade & a little gold tiger paw hanging from her belly ring. She's been known to have "Discussions" with Carolina fans in the past.) God love her!!

I'm watching the Fla/Fla State game right now & just look at them!!! Huge rivals deep into the second with the underdog winning & everyone's being nice!! Just the way it should be. And if you're one of those people that LIKE seeing chit like the D/I game last night & what happened today; you should just be watching WWF. Because that kind of behavior doesn't have a place in any other sport. See? That Seminole just helped that Gator stand up!

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peace

I know you're all thinking that I'm way too preoccupied with the "search words" option on my sitemeter. I'm sorry; but I gotta get my kicks wherever I can. Today I just fell down laughing that someone found me searching "southern redneck nascar girl fans". Now, I'm thinking this is a guy that definitely knows what he wants. To a T. So I check it out & it turns out I am #9 on this search. Thank God for the other 8. Too freakin' funny.

peace

....to look my absolute best everyday. I trained one last time today & out of roughly 70 people that came in; only one was a woman. And it's like that pretty much everyday. I swear this place wasn't like this when my ex bf worked there several years ago. I seem to have stumbled upon an un-tapped resource. My first instinct was to call all my girlfriends to let them know; but have decided to just keep it to myself for a while longer. The girls will be coming in for Happy Hours soon enough. And I really don't know how I feel about this "shallow" part of myself I've discovered.

I've just added Pluff Mud Musings. Check it out. Very entertaining guy from my neck of the woods. He has some pretty saucy posts and saucy is always a good thing in my book.

peace

Background: this is my last week at my job. I was supposed to work Tues.- Thurs. Typically, when a bartender is leaving; the house starts thinking about weather or not the departing bartender is going to give the house away. Meaning; giving free drinks like nobody's business. I've worked there for almost 7 years & am kinda insulted that my integrity would be questioned; but I guess it has been. I walked into work tonight & was told that upper management (2 people) wanted to talk to me & that I was not to clock in. I was then told that it was appreciated that I had put in two weeks notice; but my services would not be needed any longer. Wow. I know that the last guy that left gave away the house; but was surprised that they thought I would do that as well. I made the decision to leave there on a good note when I gave them two weeks. I didn't have to do that. I could have just not showed up one night. Oh well.

I was very flattered that I got 12 phone calls in the space of two hours from people wanting to know what the f was going on 'cause they had come to see me & I wasn't there. No matter...I'm moving on to bigger & better things. I hate that I couldn't have a nice little clean break with the past; but you know what? When I'm back in the "real world" working a "real job", will those two even matter? Not at fucking all.

Well, I had a great pedicure today & have decided I'm just going to marry the man (or at least buy dinner) that can rub my feet like that!! I'm such a sucker for that. Seriously....you can run over my dog and deflate my souffle; but if you can rub my feet....you're golden.

peace

I don't understand why my photo isn't showing up. Well, it wasn't a real photo; just some cute clip-art. Everything is as it should be & I don't know why it's not showing anymore. Sorry...just thinking out loud.

peace

It's not like I wanted breakfast in bed or asked you to wash my car. All I needed from you was just 3 more points. Just 3. And then I could have won this weekend & continued to enjoy being tied for 1st. And what was I thinking picking up an RB from Dallas anyway? I don't even like Dallas. Haven't liked them since Landry left. Thank God for my man Daunte (throws for 4 & gets me 39 points) & my Chicago defense (48 points). Wasn't for them; I would have made no showing at all. Damn, the stress of being at the top of the league is killing me. Past years when I was only doing mediocre; I was so much happier.

I've been training at my new job this past week (while working out notice at the old one). I'm really going to like it. Working with all very attractive male bartenders doesn't hurt. And I've already fallen into the "little sister" category where they all don't want me to "hurt" myself by carrying those big 'ole cases of beer. I like that category & will do my best to live up to it. Thursday is my last night at the old job; and I'm pretty excited. Looks like I'm going to have a big turnout. I just hope I'm able to get out early enough to do a little celebrating of my own.

I'm not even going to talk about Clemson losing to Duke 16-13. Cause it's just too shameful. We can beat Miami on their turf & not beat Duke? My dear Tommy; don't make me sit you down AGAIN!

All's quiet on the "lying bastard" front; as I haven't received text or call since last Wednesday. He's back to work from vacation tomorrow, so if I'm going to hear anything else; it will be then. I'm thinking not. Which is OK with me. Finding out how much he lied to me seems to have squashed any good feelings I had about him. I've decided I'm going to accept every single date that comes my way. If nothing else; I'll make some new friends. And you can never have too many of those. And I want to thank those of you that have listened to me rant & rave this past week. You know who you are.

Before I go, I want to say CONGRATULATIONS!!! to my friend Rhino on his promotion. You're the best, babe!

peace

I think it's pretty funny that people searching "girl flashing boobs at red sox game" keep finding their way to this site.

peace

So, referring to my last post when I talked about how we were going to try to remain friends. Not gonna happen. I was talking to a good friend of mine Sat. night who happens to be a cop. I was telling him how everything went down, that it was sad for me; but I was looking at it as an "experience" and moving on. I told him that how about 3 months ago I was suspicious that the guy wasn't being completely upfront with me about the status of this other "relationship"; but after asking him some questions, I felt satisfied that he was being truthful. Because I trusted him. My friend says, "All I need is his name and DOB & I can tell you in five minutes". Five minutes later, I know that he changed his address 3 months ago. How's that for intuition? He's living with her. And has been presenting it to me as "There are issues we need to work out before we could get back together." And ya know how sometimes you get one little piece of information & it makes everything just come together in your head? I pride myself on being a pretty good judge of character; but I completely missed the mark on this one.

It was pretty funny in a very sad way to hear him try to back-peddle, double-talk, & contradict himself when we finally talked today. It was mostly "you said, I said" stuff. Don't you just hate it when someone tells you they ABSOLUTELY didn't say something you know they said? Some things are just burned into your head because it's that important to you to make sure you understood it at the time. (Some things I had even written about as soon as they were said.) And then when they know you're right; they start trying to split hairs. For example, "You're wrong! You asked me if I was riding a bike, and I said NO! That's true, because I had stopped riding to answer your call." You get what I'm saying.

There were the half-truths I had gotten when asking a direct question which are just lies by omission. One contradiction was three-fold (German judge gives him a 9.7 for difficulty). In the space of ten minutes, he was: soon to move, moved last week, in the process of moving. It was kinda hard to keep up; but I was truly amazed at how he wasn't listening to himself talk.

I wasn't crazy surprised when he ended things with me last week; because I knew it was going to have to happen. He was only working in the area for a certain period of time. I knew there was someone where he actually lives that he was more than likely going to get back together with. My whole problem with this is that he didn't tell me when they got back together. You would think that as honest as he was by telling me of that possibility; that he would have told me when it happened. There was a short period that I thought I WAS the "other woman", but was assured I wasn't. (Actually, that was only defined by him telling me he wasn't sleeping with her. So I believed him & assumed they had not gotten back together. Turns out that wasn't true.)

What I'm trying to say is; the reason I am so upset is not that we're not going to be seeing each other anymore. I was sad about that; but was confident that we would be able to continue a friendship because getting along well was never a problem. We had an awesome time whenever we were together & could talk, laugh...it was pretty amazing. After the first month; I couldn't believe my good luck at finding someone so perfect for me. During the second when he gave me heads up about the other person; I put all those feelings in check & just decided I would enjoy the time while it lasted. Which in my mind; was until he told me they were definitely getting back together. He never told me that. And THAT is the reason I am so upset. Three days ago, I was fine with working on remaining friends until I got this new piece of information. Now I know that for the last who know's how many months; he's just enjoyed having a warm bed in two different cities. If he had been honest with me when they got back together, I would have bowed out. He knows that....it would have been hard; but I would have done it. I'm no good at (and don't believe in) sharing. OMG...I feel so sorry for her. I truly do. I'm sure wherever his next project is; his next victim is. And she's keeping the home-fires burning. Now, THAT'S sad.

Out of anger, I told him (and I would never do this) that I was going to send her a letter. You wouldn't believe the flurry of text's after that. I did write a letter to her; but only for therapeutic reasons. I would never mail it. I believe that bad things you do eventually come back to bite you in the ass (karma & all that) so she'll find out how he is at some point.

Just in case you're dying to know; guess what he said to me when I asked him why he didn't tell me. "I'm not obligated to share information about my personal life with you." So when he told me he loved me; I guess he meant it in an "I love my car" kind of way. Unbelievable.

But I guess that I should clarify something. We had both agreed a month ago that we loved each other; but it was the kind of love you have for someone that you care very much for. Not to be confused with "being in love". And I don't know about you; but I tend to share things about my personal life (like where they can send me an X-mas card) with the people that I love.

Well, now I'm not as sad anymore about us not seeing each other. Now I'm just angry & my pride is hurt for being so stupid. Ok, maybe I'm still a little sad.

BUT! I started training at my new job tonight! It was really cool & I will talk about it tomorrow because I'm kind of emotionally wrung out right now. So, enough of this "how-that-guy-dissed-me-talk". Bigger & better stories to be told! New men to meet!!! Actually, it's pretty fucking exciting to be starting a new job. Being a bartender, anyway.

And I won this w'end. I'm 7-2! Tied for first!

peace

I handed in my notice today. I can't even describe what a wonderful f'ing feeling it was! Just to backtrack a little; I've been very unhappy at my job for the last 3 months or so. The big boss that took over after the death of our GM doesn't like me for whatever reason & has been making my life hell. She tried to find reasons to fire me and when she couldn't; she changed things around so that it ended up I'm splitting tips with another bartender on the w'ends which pretty much takes my rent out of my pocket every month.

I put the word out that I was looking & was very flattered with the response I got. I had halfway committed to a new restaurant that didn't have an official opening date & this opportunity just fell into my lap. It's at a restaurant that my ex-boyfriend bartended at the first year 1/2 after we moved back to the states. I know pretty much everyone that works/goes there; so I think it will be a smooth transition. The woman that is the GM there now is someone I met when I first moved here & we've been friends since then. She called me up a couple of weeks ago with the offer; and after finding out I could take my certs on the w'ends; I accepted. It's very hard leaving somewhere you've worked for almost 7 years; but I am SO excited about the new job! I've known Linda (GM at the new job) for 8 years & think she is an incredible woman. I know it's going to be awesome working for her & with all the other people there.

And the schedule is a bartender's dream. 10am - 6pm Monday - Friday @ GREAT money. Evenings & weekends free w/ GREAT money? And I say that from the point of view of a bartender that's been doing the night thing for ALOT of years & has outgrown the party-every-night-after-work thing. And I'm going to be making more money. KEY. That hardly ever happens in the bartending world that you would find a place you can make more during the day than at night.

So, if you're in the Arlington/Alexandria/DC area & want to come visit me; email me & I'll tell you where I can be found. The reason I'm not stating the name of the restaurant here is that I don't want this blog to show up if someone searches it. You understand.

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And about my heart; it hurts. And probably will for awhile. I'm not going to use this as a forum to give a blow-by-blow everyday of how I'm handling things since Tuesday's episode. I'm using my private journal for that right now because it's still too fresh & I don't want people coming here just to see how "that-poor-little-girl" is coping. As it stands now; he's there (2 hours away) & I'm here. He's going to work on rebuilding a past relationship (which he had started working on when he met me.....I side-tracked him). And that's that. We're talking & trying to find a happy medium where we can remain friends.

Wow.....reading that last paragraph....I wish I FELT that blase'; but it's all I can give right now.

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Anyway, come see me. And in exchange for your money; I promise to dazzle you with my charm, quick wit, & ability to get you drunk in a timely manner.

peace

I have to note that I just saw my first "Christmas" commercial for this year. It was an advertisement for a Greatest Hits album. Ya know, Elvis doing "Blue Christmas" and all that. It IS just November 5th, right? 49 more shopping days, right? Just checking.

With the tragedy on Tuesday (and I'm speaking of the election, and; well, maybe that other thing,too) & the 57 1/2 dimwits I dealt with at my bar last night; I wasn't up to any surprises today. I knew I was tempting fate by even getting on the beltway this morning. During rush hour. In the pouring rain. And even if you're in freakin' Fargo, ND; you probably know the DC beltway better than I do. I've been here almost 8 years & still don't know the outer-loop from the inner-loop. I mean; it's questionable that I even knew where I was going. I've been on the beltway maybe 15 times in the last eight years & it still just scares the bejesus out of me. It reminds me of 285 going in/out of Atlanta. Only worse. Everyone is tailgating at 75/80 mph no matter what the weather is. So, I start feeling a little less agitated when the traffic slows to a mere 50. But it gave me time enough to get a good glimpse of a dead (BIG) deer on the shoulder of the far left lane next to that concrete block wall that's supposed to just send your car into the air up & over all the opposing traffic just in case you hit it.

I saw it long enough to note that it didn't look hurt at all. Just looked like it was asleep. And it was all of a sudden just the saddest thing I'd ever seen. Then we're all back up to 75 on an apparent race to hell & I'm just crying my eyes out. Amazing what can set you off even when you're only subconsciously vunerable. I had been listening to Stern talk to that silly bitch that got kicked off "The Apprentice" for; and I don't even know the story; calling someone Jewish? That can't be right, but that's all I could get out of the drivel this chick was talking. If anyone knows what that was all about; I'm kinda curious.

So much for my innocent attempt to get to the nearest Harris Tetter I know of in the area and still be happy about it. I associate Harris Tetter with "back home" for some reason. Back home where we "speed" at 35mph & still feel like we're getting somewhere 'cause we just don't feel the need to experience the G's that it takes to feel like you've accomplished something up here.

And about the beltway thing; do you know that it's a "given" to have at least 3/4 tank of gas before you get on it? Because you never know what will happen that may leave you stranded in traffic for up to 6 hours. I'm recalling a tar-tanker overturn where people were stranded for that long. A tractor-trailer that burst through the railing on an overpass; fell on 6 cars below; & stranded everyone for hours. Omg...the jumper on the WW Bridge that hung everyone up for 5 hours. Back home, we'd just drive through the tar (we know how to get tar off...little bit of vinegar), drive on the grass to get around the tractor-trailer (PEOPLE! Grass grows back!), and we'd just tell the jumper "You-know-you're-a-redneck" jokes 'til he started to cry & agreed to come down (that doesn't take long).

Anyway, I have news on the job front; but can't say too much right now as I haven't put my notice in yet. Chit, have I said too much? And Rhino, I'll just whisper it: "go minn". I really need culpepper to do well this w'end. humor me.

peace

Yeah....I got 'em...by phone, no less.


But I guess it's better than the pseudo-break up with the email chit a month ago. I know I've been cryin' about this stupid "relationship" I've had going on for the last 5 months; but you'll all be happy to know it's all over. Done, done, done. He asked me to take tonight off so that we could spend some quality time together; and then called me to tell me we won't be seeing each other anymore. But he still "loves me". Spare me. Spare Him. One bright side is that I burst into tears on the poll line & some sweet lady let me cut in front of her. & noone complained. From now on, everytime I find myself in line for something; I'm just going to burst into tears. Get myself up front.

peace