Wednesday, August 20, 2008
The "Ick" Factor
I've been a bartender for quite a while. I won't say how long; but I remember when Long Island Ice Tea's were only made by the pitcher. And the pitcher cost 9 bucks.
With that said; I've pretty much seen it all and don't let that much bother me. I feel like I have to establish the fact I've been a bartender for a long time so that you don't think that I get my "panties in a wad" over just anything.
_________
So...a guy walks into the bar. It's about 3pm. On a Wednesday. He's clean cut. Skin tight black T-shirt that reads, "You're Fired!" with a silk screen finger pointing at you. Reminiscent of Uncle Sam in a Goth kinda way. He wants lunch and a beer. I asked him if he was taking a day off and he says that he "kinda works from home". (Dexter kinda works from home) I recognize him; but can't quite put my finger on it. He eats, has another beer, and then wants a whiskey. He throws out a couple of high dollar brands that we don't have and then settles on Irish Mist. Chilled. Then it hits me! I so kicked this guy out about 2 months ago!
Same MO. Lunch, beer, multiple shots of Mist chilled. Inappropriate comments to me and the women sitting next to him about human sacrifices. I bumped him at the time on a technicality because I really didn't know what to do about his graphic descriptions of human sacrifice in the name of Satan. I never thought I'd see him again.
So here he is again. The bar clears out and it's just him and me. I'm at the computer with my back to him and he asks, "What's your name again?". I say, "Kimberly. Same as earlier." He says, "Are you married?" And I thought to myself that I should lie and say that I am, in fact, married. But I'm a terrible liar when I feel a confrontation coming on.
I say, "No."
He says, "You have a great ass."
I freak the fuck out.
______________
Now, if you're a guy reading this; I know what you're thinking. You're thinking, "The guy thinks you have a great ass! Where's the harm?". I will tell you where the harm is.
#1: This is not the local pool hall
#2: This is not Hooters
#3: It is not acceptable to clean your nails with a Bowie knife anywhere near the White House! Whilst talking about human sacrifice. In the presence of, well; people! Especially bartenders who are trapped behind the bar and have no weapons! Other than a soda gun.
#4: He was not appreciating the nice ass view. He was thinking of ways to make a dress out of the skin! Ala "Silence of the Lambs".
__________________
Seriously, this guy was such a freak show with his zombie talk; I left the room until he left. (Of course this was after he had paid his bill and I knew I didn't have to cover his freaky ass.) He paid with a card and obviously didn't leave a tip.
If he comes into my bar again; I am refusing him service based on the fact that he is "Icky". And, yes; I can do that legally.
_________________
Too weird for me......
peace
With that said; I've pretty much seen it all and don't let that much bother me. I feel like I have to establish the fact I've been a bartender for a long time so that you don't think that I get my "panties in a wad" over just anything.
_________
So...a guy walks into the bar. It's about 3pm. On a Wednesday. He's clean cut. Skin tight black T-shirt that reads, "You're Fired!" with a silk screen finger pointing at you. Reminiscent of Uncle Sam in a Goth kinda way. He wants lunch and a beer. I asked him if he was taking a day off and he says that he "kinda works from home". (Dexter kinda works from home) I recognize him; but can't quite put my finger on it. He eats, has another beer, and then wants a whiskey. He throws out a couple of high dollar brands that we don't have and then settles on Irish Mist. Chilled. Then it hits me! I so kicked this guy out about 2 months ago!
Same MO. Lunch, beer, multiple shots of Mist chilled. Inappropriate comments to me and the women sitting next to him about human sacrifices. I bumped him at the time on a technicality because I really didn't know what to do about his graphic descriptions of human sacrifice in the name of Satan. I never thought I'd see him again.
So here he is again. The bar clears out and it's just him and me. I'm at the computer with my back to him and he asks, "What's your name again?". I say, "Kimberly. Same as earlier." He says, "Are you married?" And I thought to myself that I should lie and say that I am, in fact, married. But I'm a terrible liar when I feel a confrontation coming on.
I say, "No."
He says, "You have a great ass."
I freak the fuck out.
______________
Now, if you're a guy reading this; I know what you're thinking. You're thinking, "The guy thinks you have a great ass! Where's the harm?". I will tell you where the harm is.
#1: This is not the local pool hall
#2: This is not Hooters
#3: It is not acceptable to clean your nails with a Bowie knife anywhere near the White House! Whilst talking about human sacrifice. In the presence of, well; people! Especially bartenders who are trapped behind the bar and have no weapons! Other than a soda gun.
#4: He was not appreciating the nice ass view. He was thinking of ways to make a dress out of the skin! Ala "Silence of the Lambs".
__________________
Seriously, this guy was such a freak show with his zombie talk; I left the room until he left. (Of course this was after he had paid his bill and I knew I didn't have to cover his freaky ass.) He paid with a card and obviously didn't leave a tip.
If he comes into my bar again; I am refusing him service based on the fact that he is "Icky". And, yes; I can do that legally.
_________________
Too weird for me......
peace
